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Sunday, November 30, 2003

Day 71

Well, I have finnally posted the newest pictures of the kids. Cody is the little guys and I.V. Grace is my little girl with the black ear. We were totally suprised that they sat still through the whole picture taking process. I thought I would post them so the would could see how cute they are..

Sunday, November 16, 2003

Day 61

Well, I just completed a the Management Survey we were all asked to do. I had a lot on it. I have a feeling she will know who wrote it. All the topics are things that need to be addressed before the Big Guys come in and fine us. We will see what happens.

Friday, November 14, 2003

Day 58-59

I now can not sleep. I have to get some sleep maybe this will help. I usually like the TV show ER but tonight It helped bring back memories. Bad memories. When I was in Junior High School I lost 2 great people who were going through a rough time in their lives. They both made decisions that had a permanent end. My stepbrother, Jeff. committed suicide due to depression and a break up with a girl. He had such a bright future and ended it in a moment of stupidity. Several months later I lost a classmate and friend, Ryan, to the same things but add family problems to the mixed. I am not sure if Jeff was dealing with family problem. We all fought. I did not see it as much when I was visiting but I know they had problems. Tonights episode of ER had a patient shot himself in the head. Jeff & Ryan both took their lives that way. It brought back all those memories. I remember sitting with Heidi in the hallway of the school and being told to leave. I remember watching it on the news. I remember mom telling me about Jeff and then telling me that carolyn could not handle it if I was at Jeff's funeral. Last year was the the first time I accually visited his grave site. It has been very hard to deal with his death without say good-ye when it happened. It has always been a painful place in my heart. Why did the show not edit the shot out.

Sunday, November 09, 2003

Day 54

Well the weekend is over. Back to work. Well dad called and Carolyn took a tumble while in San Fransico and broke her arm and injured her leg. Will she now defantly fits into our family. Now she will return from her trip to go to the doctor. Dad admitted that he has to have surgery sometime this week. I now know why I feel the way I do and why I am so accident prone.

Well, Mr. D is ticked off because I had an evening with another guy. Does this idiot not realize that he is married. I am not going to sit around hoping for him to leave his wife. I want happiness not heartbreak. I have had enough Heartbreak. This has caused him to be short with me. Oh well life is not always what you want. You chose her not me.. LIVE WITH IT BABY.

Sunday, November 02, 2003

Day 47

Well, it is Sunday. It is back to work tomorrow after a few days off per the doctor. I still do not feel 100%. Still have times when my asthma is up. I get hot flashes and cold spells. I figure it is just the medicine. We will see. Tomorrow is the last day of it and it will hopefully get better. I wish I had not missed that time because I really would like to go up and see my dad after Christmas.

Diet wise. I need to get cracked on this diet thing. I have 20 pounds to lose by Christmas and that is only 52 days away. I have lost 6 pounds so far. 3 pounds in 4 weeks and 3 pounds being sick. I probably put it all back on do to this wonderful medicine. You have to eat whenever you take it and it makes you hungry anyway. You feel like you need to eat everything in sight. I have been trying to do well but it is hard. I went to the store today and bought stuff to take to work to snack on instead of junk. Like applesauce and peaches for my desk. Hopefully this will help. Now I need to get rid of the cookie dough in the fridge because that is a weakness. I have to get this going, maybe then I will get guys interested in me. Dave said he is not looking for a "relationship" but as I know it is just not with me. Oh well, I will lose all this weight and show him.

Goal: start school in January.

Day 46 (late entry)

Well, I must say I was very suprised that day showed up. And it was a very good evening.

I can not believe that tomorrow is my last day away from work. I does not seem like i have been able to rest the days I was suppose to be off. Oh Well. Time flies. Holloween sucked. We had a total of 7 trick-or-treaters. These old people spoil everything.